updatedA!! and finished!! chapter one for this fic 
- imma put it on ao3 later
i got my friend to beta read they're cool
Heaven was boring.
Izuru wasn’t quite able to describe heaven, the words nonexistent and the environment unique. However, he did know that it was boring. No conflict, struggle, motivations, or goals; just a bunch of souls in one place, socializing and finding peace as he and the other angels were stuck watching the humans of Earth. He didn’t even truly have an identity, nor feelings; he wasn’t even a ‘he.’ His name and pronouns were given to him by his creator, his purpose and identity there with him since day one.
But it never really felt like his.
Izuru, first of all, didn’t feel like a ‘he.’ Izuru felt like… there was nothing there to label. He has watched as other angels adhered to their roles and found solace in the genders they were assigned, however, he couldn’t seem to do the same. Maybe that was a reason as to why the others avoided him.
His name didn’t fit either - ‘Izuru Kamukura.’ There were plenty of Izuru Kamukuras, angels or humans. It didn’t feel right, however, no matter how hard Izuru thought, he couldn’t come up with a new name.
In all honesty, Izuru envied the humans of Earth.
The ones with personalities and interests; the ones with emotions and goals. He didn’t have any of those. Izuru had no goals for his future, no likes or dislikes, personality traits, or emotions to express.
Just the endless void that consumed him as he did his everyday work. Boredom.
Sometimes, when alone, Izuru would let himself succumb to it - just to finally feel the numbing desire for it all to end. Those were the only moments he can recall emotion.
It sounded way worse than it actually was, he realized.
-
He was sent to Earth for about a single human year. Izuru had done missions like these plenty of times; watch over his assigned human, up until their death or until a true goal of theirs is fulfilled. A year was actually a short amount of time - was his human seriously that close to death? How unfortunate.
Izuru sits down on the park bench and takes out the contract, disguised as paper in a notebook to human eyes. Just in case.
Komaeda Nagito. 21. Frontotemporal dementia. Upcoming Cancer. Death will be X/XX/XXXX.
“Hm.” Compared to his own, boring name, this person’s was unique. A strange name, ‘Komaeda Nagito.’ It didn’t seem that well put together - the thought caused brief amusement.
Izuru was destined to meet his human here; he will have to befriend them, maybe even become their lover, and stay with them for as long as his mission would take him, a year being the limit. Becoming a human’s lover was dangerous though; falling for one was acknowledged as an act of sin, one that would call for immediate banishment. So, to be their lover, you must never truly fall. How bothersome, Izuru wouldn’t ever do that…
‘I shouldn’t get so worked up. You’ve done this since the beginning; it is just another -’
Izuru is interrupted by a hit to the back of the head, a book falling next to him. He winces before turning around, spotting the culprit.
“Ah, apologies, Mx! The wind took the book out of my hands,,’
‘The wind…?’
The man walks over and smiles, leaning over the back of the bench. A singular sound is what catches Izuru’s attention first - or was it a word?
“‘Mx?’”
“Hm? Ah - it’s an English gender-neutral term. Since I don’t know your gender…” The man shrugs, nervously laughing as he picks up his book and closes it gently. “I’m sorry for the inconvenience! And for the uncalled for honorific -”
Izuru shakes his head in response, excessively before staring at the other. He sits upright and tilts his head towards the man - person. “It is fine. I have just never heard that before.” ‘I like it.’
He liked something.
The other smiles at him before nodding. “Well, now you have! I’m Komaeda Nagito, by the way. Oh - and I’m a man. Since that was the topic of discussion; he/him.” He holds out his hand, waiting for a handshake on return. Izuru stares before slowly reaching out and shaking his hand back, unused to it. People usually met him in workplaces, without formality, since they already knew his name by working with him; but, he supposes meeting Komaeda was meant to be different?
“I am called Kamukura Izuru. And,, I am a…” Izuru frowns as he thinks. ‘What am I?’
Apparently, he must have taken too long, as Komaeda clears his throat and pulls his hand away. “If you don’t know, that’s fine! What pronouns do you currently use?”
“He/Him.”
“Ah okay!,, So, what are you doing this evening?”
“… Sitting here.” This response earns a raised eyebrow in return, Komaeda staring. Ah, he must have said something strange; perhaps too literal.
Komaeda then smiles again, nodding. “Okay! Well, to make this less awkward, I was reading! Of course. I apologize greatly for intruding on your sitting! You probably hate me now, haha -!”
With a sigh, Izuru stands with a shake of his head, the other going silent and staring. “No. It is fine. I don’t hate you.” He hums softly, turning to Komaeda and nodding once. “Are you currently free? For discussion, of course.” ‘Might as well start with forming a relationship now.’
Komaeda blinks once, now looking up at Izuru before chuckling a bit. He stands up straight as well, still staring.
“Is something wrong?” Izuru inquiries.
Komaeda seems to finally snap out of it, cheeks flushing red as he nervously chuckles. “Nothing! It’s just that…” He closes his eyes for a moment before smiling softly, catching Izuru a bit off guard. “You look very lovely. I hadn’t realized the length of your hair until you stood up, however, I like it. I think it suits you.”
“… Oh.” Instinctively, Izuru touches his hair, twirling it with a finger while looking away from the man. “Mm. Alright. May you answer my question?”
“Mhm, of course! I’m free, I was just relaxing and catching up on my book. Until, well, the book hit you in the back of your head,,”
“Alright then.” Komaeda perks up as Izuru walks up behind the bench, next to him, and puts a hand on his shoulder.
“Let’s go get something to eat. I wish to get to know you.”